Korean Tektoniker Dances Outside The Box

Thank You CBC Radio 2

Driving home to Peterborough from Montreal was a real pleasure.

6:30 am. Beautiful light. Time to think. And CBC Radio 2, straight from Newfoundland.

It was a great opportunity to catch up some new Canadian content that I've missed over the past few months, and other cool bits and pieces.

This is a taste of what my morning sounded like, for those of you who are interested:

Great Lake Swimmers new single:

Yael Naim

 

Glen Campbell (I had no idea this was his song)

When Things Finally Start Going Your Way

When things finally start to go my way, I always feel like I shouldn't tell anyone because I just might jinx it. 

Against all my better judgement, I will share with you my good news.

As of Monday morning I became 'Green', as in the US Immigration Services granted me my Green Card.

Two years later. 

Thank you.

I am pretty sure they can't take it away from me at this point, but no wait.

Silly me, now I remember reading the fine print. 

It said "You are still not American, so we reserve the right to do whatever the hell we like."

Right. Got it. Thank you. I won't forget this time.

Jest aside, I am very grateful for this opportunity, and even more grateful that this process is drawing to a close.

After all the hoopla and working myself up about the Embassy Interview, not to mention working up all my family and friends about the whole thing, it all felt very anti-climactic. A friend of mine actually cried real tears when she heard the results. I on the other hand felt like I just finished watching a long anticipated film that turned out to be nothing special. Sort of like the new Star Wars episodes. 

I don't feel like running through every detail of the day.

I've been living 'details' for the last 9 months and I think I am becoming either tired or bored of them. Possibly both. 

Sign this. Date that. Reread. Copy. Understand. Reformat. Send. Attach. Don't smile. And pay, pay, pay.

Here, instead, is my short version of Monday mornings US Embassy Meeting, which I think is just as good and gets the point across well enough.

1. 7:30am Embassy doors open.

2. Airport style security in the lobby of an inconspicuous building.

3. First in line.

4. Alone in the large waiting room on the top floor of inconspicuous building.

5. Feeling like all of a sudden I am in the Matrix.

6. Called to the desk.

7. Collection of documents.

8. Told to wait. 

9. While waiting, watch poor Indian man being belittled by dominatrix immigration official. 

9a. Thank God I didn't end up with Dominatrix Lady.

10. Futuristic finger print taking with futuristic fingerprint taking device.

11. Lots more waiting.

12. Raise right hand and swear to God you are not a terrorist.

13. Show us the money!

14. Tsk, tsk. Shame on you for visiting your husband too much.

15. Approved!

My tension levels were up and down throughout the whole morning. 

I walked in there believing I wouldn't be approved. 

Then I got very confident. 

Then I saw Indian Man get shut-down by Dominatrix Lady and the confidence levels became more realistic (ie. lower).

Finally, when I was being interviewed any self-assurance I had left hit the floor. Seconds later I was approved.

What a mind-job. 

Thankfully the staff at the embassy were professional and kind (at least the people I dealt with were). 

It was nothing like dealing with customs officials at the border.

Now I have a little bit of waiting to do before I fly home to my nutrient starved husband.

Apparently he is on a high-gluten diet.

Pizza and beer. 

I'm almost positive that there hasn't been anything green in the house for weeks. 

Just wait t'ill I get home to him. Not only will I have a 'Green' Card, but fresh veggies will once again prevail!

And also, I can finally get cracking on that intestinal cleanse i've always wanted to do.

I bet he just can't wait.

Going Green

Tomorrow is the moment of truth.

Tomorrow I go where no sane person has gone before.

Tomorrow I venture into the dark side.

Tomorrow is my Green Card interview.

Send a prayer up for me!

M.

If only I was a war-bride or a mennonite, life could be this easy.

The Clean Bin Project

I'm looking forward to this documentary when it comes out:

Examine This!

If you ever want to know what it feels like to be put through a bureaucratic meat grinder, just try immigrating to the US and then at the same time apply for a job in Japan.

Today mom and I drove into Toronto for my 3rd doctor's appointment in less than one month.

#1 was for a tetanus booster required by the US government.

#2 was again for the US government, proving I was void of all plagues and infestations.

#3 was for the Japanese government, also reassuring them that I'm clean as a whistle and that my body is in fact pneumonia-SARS-madcow free.

It crossed my mind that maybe I should have just asked Japan to talk to America, cause America already did this whole health inspection routine thing already, and it would save me time, Canada money and we'd all live happily ever after.

But no, it doesn't really work like that, does it. I admit, the idea of two world power's actually sharing practical information with each other almost borders on the absurd.

Most of my Japan Health Exam is over with, but there are a couple loose ends to tie up. I have yet another trip to the doctor next week. I have to get a urine sample analyzed. 

I will also have to do something about my pulse rate because the doctor forgot to note it down on my health form. This, I only figured out after driving the 1.5 hours back to Peterborough. Against my not-so better judgement to take my own pulse and fill in the blank, I plan on calling her tomorrow and somehow remedying this situation. I may have to make another trip back for her to put her fingers on my wrist and tell me that yes, I'm still alive. 

In the meantime, while I wait for just the right opportunity to pee into a tiny little cup (whose tiny size guarantee's I will almost certainly get most of my urine on my hand, and not in the cup), me and the parental units are headed to Montreal with the huge x-ray of my chest to show to staff at the US Consulate. Of course, that's not the only thing they will want to see from me, but it's far more interesting than all the other official documents and proofs of marriage I have to deliver.

So if you believe in prayer, pray for me this weekend, because Monday I'll be sitting in the most important interview of my life thus far, and it's going to take a lot more than just a cool chest x-ray to get me through it successfully.